The title of this page sounds dramatic, sure, but think of it from a kid's perspective. He was due to stand trial on January 6, he died on January 10, and he spent three nights in a coma. According to the mythology I've constructed, something that happened on my father's trial date of January 6 directly precipitated his death on January 10, which ended my life as I knew it and sent me on a new, fatherless path.

It's simple chronology, simple post hoc logic, part of the ritual I relive every deathiversary day. I explain it to people thusly: "He was about to go on trial for attempted murder when he had a stroke and died." 

Neat, clear, in order. I had extensive talks with my brother Mike (back when we were talking) about this version of events. We even wondered if he killed himself, perhaps through some combination of pills and booze, because of what happened at the trial, or what was about to happen. 

The words scribbled on the envelope above confused me, though. Did they really not go? That would completely blow my theories. My mom, true to form, doesn't remember. So the mystery of the relationship between his trial and his death stubbornly remains a mystery.